Stupid Sexy Brat
by Kathlan315
Summary: RATED M! Deidara and Hidan goes to a bar, when they get ..Hidan dared Deidara something that led to smexy Yaoi!


**Stupid Sexy Brat**

**One-shot.**

**DeiSaso: As in Deidara seme and Sasori uke.**

**(note: Every pause of the dairy is a time skip as the person decide to write it later. If you get what I mean.)**

* * *

"Come on! Hurry the fuck up!" Hidan shouted out to Deidara. "I need to fuck right now!"

"Bye, Sasori-Danna. un." He smiled at me. "I'll be back soon, un. "

"Why would I care?" I bit back harshly as I watched him go. I should stop him. But I can't. My mouth's not moving. _move. You damn mouth. Urgh! _He's gone. I can't sight him anymore. I'm so stupid. Deidara and Hidan decided to go out to have some fun. They're going to go to a bar and as Hidan say 'get laid'. Brat told me he wouldn't do anything. Hell he doesn't even like women. But I don't care...yeah, I don't. Leader actually ok with that. He said that if they aren't recognized, they're fine.

I doubt that.

Stupid brat does stupid things. Though, he's just a teen. So I guess he's still dealing with normal human hardships. Things like puberty and teenage hormones happen I guess. That's what I've been told so. _He just needs space. _I told myself. Even though I can't stop worrying about the brat. Hidan's a bad example. Even when his 'boyfriend' Kakuzu's there. They aren't really lovers, it's just a nickname. They've, well Hidan has been begging Kakuzu to screw him because of his own hormones? Anyways, he goes out and drinks way too much. But he has Kakuzu to drag him back. The brat doesn't. I wanted to go, but my pride told me otherwise. I don't even have a reason to go. Puppets don't drink. _I'm worrying too much! _I scolded myself but I just can't stop worrying.

Maybe I care for him more than I expect. Maybe I watch out for him more than I realize. And just **maybe**...I like him more than I'm suppose to.

It's mid-night now and still no sign of the brat. This is not good. I tried to work on Hiruko, even though there's nothing wrong with it. I need to get my mind off things. Sigh. Tonight's going to be a long night. I turned on the little lamp by my desk and grabbed a random book that was on the book. Or so I thought. I sat on the bed, and opened a random page of it.

_Feb. 22. 3019_

_Dear Dairy, or whoever's reading it but I'm the only that's going to read it so, un._

I stared at the handwriting of this. Is this a...Dairy? It must be the brat's Dairy then. He writes these? Interesting.

_Today was just a normal day like always. I'm at the usual café, talking to Kyra. And, just when I over heard the forbidden kinjutsu. So, to put my art to the greatest...I went and stole that. You know, it was freaking easy! So, I tested a few explosion on some random buildings that got me more ANBU. Just great. Then I met this weird guy that looked like an fish. And this guy that looks like an Uchiha? Last we have this weird-looking old-man with a mask. Me and the Uchiha fought, and I lost. But I'll beat him one day, yeah! ... ... ...Can you believe it? The old-man. The big fat, weird-looking, uncool, stupid, not so artistic fatty...is actually just a mere puppet? And the one who created it, the **real **Akasuna no Sasori is someone that's not over 15? Someone with cool red locks, and a totally cute, and uke-ish face?_

what did I just read? I need to read it again...He just said that I have a...never mind.

"that brat!" I whispered out loud as I threw the book against the wall. Stupid brat. Thinking that wasn't going to help in anyways. I looked at the clock, 12:11 a.m. Where the hell is that...pervert? Why do I care. No I don't care, that's what. I went over to the book and began to read some pages again. Just to pass the time, nothing else.

_June. 24. 3019_

_Dear Me._

_Sasori-Danna has been well, himself but totally cute. Smirk. Sometimes I just can't stop staring at his ass. If he ever saw this dairy, he might kill me. Sigh. Whatever. Then again, he's just stupid when it comes to art. 'Art is eternal' blah, blah, blah. 'true art should last forever' that's crap. Total useless shit, that is. Art is a BANG! An explosion! HELL YEAH! 'art is everlasting beauty' kiss my ass. Fuck that. Un. This could continue for hours. Sure. It's cute when he huff his cheeks at me, even though he said that he isn't. HA! Even though he's like that. You know, a total jerk sometimes. I can't deny that he's still totally fuckable. Smirk. _

Well, good to know that. I got bored and flipped through some other pages. Nothing's interesting to read. But stopped, when I saw the word 'puppet'.

_June 29. 3019_

_Dear Me._

_This is bad. Seriously, extremely, totally, tremendously BAD. Sasori-Danna's going to be back any sec. and I CAN'T FIX IT! Hope he won't be too mad. Laugh. He's not going to be mad. He's just going to kill me...what a way to think positively. but dude. it's just a puppet. that sort of looked like a Kage I knew. Hopefully, he won't find out. I'll just have to hide it. Sasori-Danna has tons of puppets. There's a slight chance that he'll find out. So yeah. Wish me luck. Hopefully, he'll forget about this one. __I'll just hide it-_

"Sasori-Danna?" A familiar voice questioned. I looked up to see Deidara standing in front of me, gasping. The _wonderful _smell of saké hit my nose. Gr. I should have removed my smelling sense too. I closed the book and held it out to Deidara. He didn't take it. Perhaps too shocked to.

"Well?" I asked.

"You...were reading it, un." He whispered. I just shrugged as if it's nothing. Because, I need to lower his guard and then find out where the fuck did he hid my favorite puppet.

"Yes." I answered calmly. "And also, good to know that I'm totally fuckable. As you put it."

He gulped as he took the book from my hand. He didn't say anything as he sat on the bed. He eyed me carefully and took a deep breathe.

"Well. You are." He smirked. Seemingly to gather his coolness again. I walked towards him and placed myself in his lap. "S-Sasori-Danna, w-what are you doing, un?"

"What do you think?" I held out a kunai moving it toward his throat, as his eyes widen. "Where the hell did you hide the third Kazekage?"

"Huh?" Deidara questioned 'oh-so-innocently' with a smirk on his face. God, I just want to wipe that nasty grin off of his 'pretty' face. "I don't know what you're talking about, hmm."

"Sure." I said sarcastically.

"I'm saying the truth, yeah."

* * *

I woke up to an explosion. I looked at the clock, in green letters it shined 3:07 a.m. I didn't really sleep, I was just thinking. Closing my eyes and thinking about a certain blonde. I don't understand. Why didn't I question Deidara like I planned on? Why did I give up? Why did I let him go? Music hit my ears, but I can't bring myself to care anymore. I don't know. What is this feeling that told me it isn't right to treat the blonde like this? I don't know, and I don't want to know.

I sighed and went down stairs to see...Deidara...dancing...on a pole.

His Akatsuki cloak was on the floor.

He's only wearing that fishnet shirt and tight black jeans.

Where the hell did the pole came from?

"What the-" I gaped. Deidara flashed a wink at me and all I could think of is...What the fuck?

"Like what you're fucking seeing?" Hidan smirked as he elbowed me. "It was an dare~ I came up with it. Fucking brilliant huh?"

"Just _fantastic._" I answered sarcastically. A music I've never heard before was on. I tried not to listen but Hidan was singing along with it. **Really** loud. "Where's Pein!?"

"On a fucking vacation with Konan." just what I need. A house full of insane people who needs to either go to a mental hospital or the zoo.

_Oh~ _

_I know I'm sexy!_

_But there's no need to go crazy._

_Because I know, I know~_

_All you need is just a blow._

_Just to take a break._

_And perhaps a little cake._

_Just come here..._

"Sasori-Danna," Deidara shouted out. Moving toward me and backed me up to a wall. His face was just inches away from mine. I could feel his breathe, it smelled like sake. No wonder. I glared at him and tried to pull away from this perverted mind brat."You're trying to get away, un. But that's useless."

"Brat." I warned him. "move. **now!**"

_Oh~_

_I know I'm sexy!_

_No need to hasty!_

_Don't get an erection! _

_From my smexy action._

_Just come here._

_And I'll whisper to your ear..._

_"I need to fuck." _Deidara whispered to my ear. Biting softly on my earlobe. I shivered at the feeling. God. How come I can still feel? "I see, you can feel me after all, hmm."

"Why me?" I asked cautiously. "Why not some random women at the bar?"

"Sasori." He dropped the smirk and kissed me roughly. I've never had a kiss before. It actually felt good. I paused for a bit as he nibbled on my lips, asking for entrance. I hesitated, but let him do all the work. I gave up. I need to let it out. After my thirdty-eight years of living, I never felt so good. I guess **one **night stand wouldn't be so bad. By one, I **mean **one. No more than that.

"What?" I panted, he grined at me.

"I love you, hmm." _No. You don't._ I corrected the sentence in my mind.

_This type of love isn't rational,_

_It's phyiscal._

"I'll believe that," I turned my face away from his smug grin. "When Hidan turns christan."

"Sasori-Danna..." He wanted to say something. But didn't quite finish it because Hidan jumped in.

"GET A ROOM!" He said with a sake bottle in his hand. Deidara took my hand and lead me toward our shared room. I didn't say anything, not because I didn't want to. I didn't know what to say. Deidara's quite an guy. He, to be honest, is real sexy. He has good musles, and a good attitude toward everything. Even when he was fighting with Ichibi, he was grinning all the way. He even lost his arm, but refused to drop the smile. Not that I hate him, it's just that I...

"Sasori-Danna, hmm." Deidara smirked and pushed me down onto the bed roughly. "Time for the real fun. Hmm."

"...just do it." I said catiously, not really sure what to do with this.

"Un." He took off my cloak and trailed his hand-mouth down my pants. I moaned a little, wondering how can I feel this. "Are you a virgin, un?"

"...No." I lied, turning away from him. My pride wouldn't allow me to say 'yes, I've never had sex before.' Deidara chuckled, and kissed me forcefully. He pulls away and grinned at me.

"You're lying, un."

I growled and tried to get up, as a result I got pushed back down again. I glared at him, the patience thing is really getting me. I don't know what to do. "Impatience as ever, Danna. Un." I closed my eyes, trying to deny the good feeling. He told me to just stay still as he took my member into his mouth. The warmth is burning, but it feels good. I moaned again, melting into his hold. I came, hard. Deidara wiped the cum from his face, and kissed me again. I returned the kiss and let him do what he wants. His hand mouths were biting my heart softly, the veins near the heart turned purple. Deidara frowned, as he pulled away. "Does it hurt, hmm?" He played with my red locks as he eyed the purple heart.

"It's fine, Dei." I panted, brushing my wooden hands in his silky blonde hair. "Just continue..."'

"You sound desperate, Danna." He grinned at me, and entered without a warning. I gasped, and grabbed on to whatever I can at this moment which is, Deidara. he stopped, to let me get use to it.

"Y-You could've w-warned me." I whispered, hardly have any strength to even sit up.

"You just sound too needy for me to wait, hmm." Deidara smiled. "Plus, I like it rough. hmm."

"Tsk. Whatever, just hurry up and finish."

"As you wish, yeah." He slammed into me over and over again. It felt so great, even though it hurts. I moaned loudly, and we came together. Deidara grinned, and kissed me softly. He got up, and lend me his hand. I took it, and we took a shower together. Boy, my ass is going to hurt tomorrow. I snored softly into Deidara's chest, even though I don't sleep. Maybe it was a good thing, to have a one night stand...

"Sasori. I'm planning on keeping you, so...don't run away, un."

"Don't count on that."

* * *

**THE END.**

**sorry for the sloppy sex part. first time ever writing it. AND my first DeiSaso...reviews pretty please?**


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